Friday, July 20, 2012

My God Wink

I found this book at Dollar General, of all places, called "God Winks" by SQuire Rushnell and I was impressed with the stories of God's sovereignty. A "God Wink" is those little things that happen in our life that we consider coincidences, but are actually signs of God working in our life. I love how Rushnell described why God Winks help us,
"In times of UNCERTAINTY what we desire more than anything else is CERTAINTY. Certainty that our families are safe. Certainty that we won't get downsized or that we'll have enough in the checkbook to make it through the month. We crave certainty when we get a scary medical report. And we long for certainty in our relationships.
It's during times of uncertainty that we especially need to get connected to our faith. We need to believe that our lives are not random like twigs floating on a stream to destinations unknown. Instead, we need to know that we all have a greater purpose; that someone really is up there watching over us and we're always on an incredible GPS...what I call God's Positioning System™...never alone. To me, the best thing about godwinks is that they are TANGIBLE SIGNPOSTS along our way, giving us hope, replacing uncertainty with a genuine feeling of CERTAINTY that everything is going to be okay!"
That's so true! You can submit your own God Winks to SQuire Rushnell through his website: http://www.whengodwinks.com/ but I thought I'd share one of our "God Winks" through our blog. I truly believe that God is in control and I have faith that God is working in Kyle and I's life in miraculous ways. I'm about to tell you a God Wink story from our lives, but before I do, this book in and of itself is a God Wink, because a few Christmas' ago one of Kyle's stocking gifts was this book. He laughed as he rummaged through his gifts, because he had given me the exact book! (We took it as a sign we were meant to read it!)

My God Wink story may not seem miraculous to you, but to me it was the CERTAINTY I needed that there really is someone up there who knows best, giving me hope in things to come - especially those little "God Winks" that I know will continue to pop up in my life - forcing me to believe that there's no such thing in coincidences.

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During our marriage counseling sessions with our pastor Doug, one of the first pieces of advice he gave us was to find a Bible teaching church, where we would grow in our relationship with Christ. We are not to become stagnant Christians! God calls us to grow in Him through His word. Kyle took this seriously, I however, was struggling with the idea of going back to church.

Growing up, I had associated church with drama, unfaithful Christians, backstabbers, and hypocrisy. My family had many bad experiences at church and as a pastor's daughter, I watched my dad endure these times with his head down on the couch, on his knees, in deep prayer. It ate him alive. Every single time my dad stood up for what I had grown up knowing was godly and good, it made people mad! So there would be an instant uproar, people would leave, drama would incur, people we had thought were friends would suddenly disappear from our lives, and we would move. I hated moving, because that meant leaving my friends, starting over in a new school, and making new friends. That was pretty scary to me. I've lived in five different states and the reason we moved from three of them was because we experienced some sort of drama within the church my dad pastored.

I remember one particular incident where a married woman of our church was in an adulterous relationship. The elders and my father made a decision that she would no longer lead the church in worship until this situation was resolved. That was the information given to me as a child. One morning, she had the audacity to try and play the piano during a special and my father took the tough position and quietly asked her to step down. Half the church got up and left with her! As a ten year old, that particular incident was etched in my brain and I had associated church with these kind of people. As time went on the mother of this woman, who lived across the street, would spy on us through her window throughout her day. I remember my sister and I making a rather large production one time on our driveway, playing loud music, yelling along, and dancing crazily on our roller blades, just to give her something to watch and probably talk about. "Those crazy pastor's kids!" The sad thing is, I have story after story about "Christians" in church and I had zero desire to attend another one.

So when Kyle said, "Becky, let's try to find a church to attend." My guard was immediately up. I didn't want to try, "I know what goes on behind the scenes in those places." Kyle is ever the patient type, "I really feel this is something we need to do, will you at least pray about it?" I had at least agreed do that. At first, I was angered with Kyle. He knew my stories of "church" and how it destroyed my family! How could he ask me to do this?!

Well... God works in miraculous ways. Kyle and I had bought his and her's devotion sets and decided to read them daily. It was a great start to the day. That very morning, after Kyle had asked me to pray about attending church, the topic on my devotional was titled, "CHURCH". The date was September 2 and the subtitle was Do I really need to go to church? Wow, that was the exact question I had rolling around in my tiny brain! Here's what my devotional said,
God's Response: "Let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other." (Hebrews 10:25)
Just after reading that verse, I felt myself shrink a little, but after I read what the author had to say, I knew this was a sign that I needed to to listen to my husband!
All believers together form God's family, and only by meeting together can we bond. The church exists in part to equip God's people to do God's work by encouraging them in their faith. At church, Christians learn to work together in unity and to practice reconciliation between different people in a way that is only possible by Christ's spirit. When we meet together, we can build each other up and help each other.
I conceded, "OK, God! I'll go!" (I think I actually said it out loud!) and I felt like a weight had been lifted from my heart. When we finally found a church that taught directly from God's word, I began changing in ways that are truly miraculous and would not have been possible had I not had this God Wink moment in my life. God's sovereignty continues to amaze me. If I look around I can see His hand at work in all aspects of our lives! I want to glorify God for this moment because I'm not Who I Once Was, thanks to Him and the powerful way He has worked in my life and in my marriage.

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