My childhood attempt at pleasing God: My father spent the first twelve years of his life as a Holdeman Mennonite, who are strict in all aspects of day-to-day life - from attire to how they are to interact with the world. The times my husband had any encounter with them (to purchase food), the women were not to be in the same room as him (he was worldly). Every minute detail is controlled because they genuinely worked hard to live apart from the world, believing this pleases God. When my grandparents left the church, they were shunned from the community and the family. We did attend family reunions, but my only memory of these experiences was sitting at separate tables to eat and receiving a scolding because I introduced a child to Winnie the Pooh. (It was too worldly.) Though my father left this church with his parents as a young boy, there were still components of it that he dragged with him.
I grew up unable to paint my nails, pierce my ears, wear makeup, etc. My behavior and my attire was closely controlled. All of this was done under the guise of "pleasing God". I could have so much to say about this topic, but I will say that I spent forty years floundering with the concept of what it means to please God. I spent so much of my life living in fear of failing. If I failed, then obviously God was not pleased. If He was not pleased, then obviously I was hell-bound. So each night I prayed for forgiveness, but each day was wrought with failure.
I lived in fear of Christ's return.
I did not open my Bible to read it on my own. I did not have the experience of either of my parents teaching me Scripture at home or reading it with me. I had basic Bible skills (where to find books, etc.) and I grew up hearing Bible stories such as Noah and the Ark where I was taught that Noah was the hero of the story. It was a very man-centered view, definitely not God-centered.
I hated it.
Fast forward to where this began to change for me. My husband and I attended a church where the pastor preached word-for-word, book-by-book from Scripture. My first experience in expository teaching was with the book Romans. I hungrily ate it up. When my pastor discovered that I still had a child's Bible, he bought me one. Then I began meeting with his wife. That was an eight-year discipleship relationship that impacted me more than I can relate here. It was at the beginning of our time together that I read through my Bible for the first time at twenty-eight years old. Where I read for the first time that God shut the door to the ark, God brought the flood, God acted in mercy by saving Noah (even though he was not perfect - gasp - he got drunk!). God was the protagonist of that story. God is sovereign. He is faithful and perfectly upholds His promises despite human failures.
A foundation built upon the character and nature of my Maker, according to His Word, was slowly being built up.
That was the beginning of my understanding of how to truly please God.
The more I read His word, the more God works in my life to reveal Himself and draw me near. The Bible is my primary source.
But every once in a while, He will use fellow believers to reveal the cobwebs of my thinking and help me clean them up.
He used Sproul's book to help me put words as to why my sheltered childhood was not one I want to impose upon my own children! How to battle the world is of extreme importance.
He used Sproul's book to help me differentiate between Biblical guilt and guilt feelings. I grew up in a fear-based home where guilt was often used to control behavior. Sproul's chapter on Fear and Guilt was transformative!
He used Sproul's book to reignite a fire in my heart in regards to the work He's called me to do every day. Afterall, God is a God who works, and He gave me work to do! And that work will change over time depending on my circumstances, but I am dependent upon an unchanging God who has given me a few minas. I fully intend to make a few minas more, no matter where He puts me.
He used Sproul's book to reignite a wholehearted pursuit of a deeper knowledge of God.
"We need sound doctrine. The Spirit of holiness is also the Spirit of truth. Truth and righteousness go together. True living flows out of true thinking. Our lives can change externally without changing internally. All that achieves is to qualify us to be Pharisees. The Spirit goes to the root of the matter. It is good trees that produce good fruit. It is the transformed mind that yields a transformed life. How we think about God is the most vital influence to how we respond to God. ...
Sound doctrine is a necessary condition for sanctification. It is a vital prerequisite. It is like oxygen and fire. The mere presence of oxygen does not guarantee a fire, but you can't have fire without it." p.216-217
He used Sproul's book to reinspire a more active participation in my sanctification. The past few years have been too busy. I was more like Martha serving than Mary, who loved to sit at the feet of Jesus soaking up His teaching.
"To be sanctified involves work. (Sproul quoted Philippians 2:12-13) Sanctification is cooperative. There are two partners involved in the work. I must work and God will work."
Gah! I loved that last line so much. God will work!
He definitely used this book to work in my heart and mind. I imagine He'd use it to accomplish work in you too!
Ruth Bell Graham is one of my favorite writers. She spent her life with a pen and notebook, and her children took notice. It was her children who convinced her to publish her writing. I've written about her before:
It's not very often that I find authors with whom I instantly connect. When I read Paul Maier's Flames of Rome, I was hooked on his work. This book, though not a historical novel, is also excellent. It's part of a three-book series, so I'm super excited to add the other two to my stuffed library. (Ha! I'll find a spot.)
