Wednesday, June 5, 2013

My Uphill Battle with Facebook

Two things occurred this last week that forced me to realize that I have a pride issue.
  1. I accidentally set my status updates at an "only me" setting, which means nobody saw what I posted on Facebook and it also means that I was crushed when nobody "liked" it. (sigh)
  2. I read this quote in my "Glimpses of Grace" by Gloria Furman book, "When I sense that my heart has become numb to the effects of my sinfulness, all I need to do is listen to my mouth or think of the things that I should have said but didn't. If I go back over the last few days' blog posts, conversations, and status updates, then my mixed motives and self-glorification become appallingly apparent to me. It is clear to me that I have no other place to hide except in the righteousness of Christ alone." (p.115)
    • Plus Furman quoted James 3:8-10, "... no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing." Bleh. Starting with my own tongue, which I can't seem to shut up.
God has this miraculous way of convicting my spirit.

Thanks to technology and the ability to publish writing immediately after writing it, my life has become an open book. I'm not complaining, I mean it's my own fault, it's just embarrassing to admit out loud that I have a "pride" issue. Thanks to an itty bitty error on my part, where I accidentally set all my posts as private posts, and was crushed when not one person "liked" it, I realized that it was God's way of telling me I was worrying too much about what others thought of my writing instead of glorifying Him in it. And then to add injury to insult I read that quote in Furman's book. Grrrr.... me and my stupid self.

I want to live my life to glorify God.

But lately it seems that all I can do is make a fool of myself.

I apologized to you, readers, because I don't want to care about my "stats" or "likes," (buuuuut I do). I want to care about what God thinks because my aim is (or should be) to glorify HIM daily in all that I say and do. After all, my entire purpose in this life and the next is to praise HIM forever and ever. However, after that setting error on Facebook I realized that inside I had mixed motives and that each post was self-glorifying. When I read Furman's struggle with the exact same thing I did a, "whew, I'm not alone!" gasp. Still, even when I write or say things outloud that are an attempt to glorify God, HE KNOWS MY HEART! So I'm with Furman on this one, "Clearly I need God's purifying power to rescue me from my sin and empower me to say things that are good, true, and honoring him." (p.115) And I need to add "from the depths of my heart" to that statement.

I need to set my heart on the things of God and make this blog and my Facebook status updates less about my self-glorification (that starts with not caring about "likes" or "stats") and more about the joy I have in life because of the hope I have in Jesus. Obviously, a few days break from Facebook has not solved this issue.

It's an uphill battle.

I'm back on Facebook because I realized that it was my only "in" on seeing pictures of a friends baby, or sharing the crazy and wonderful life of my daughter with grandparents and friends, and sharing what I write here (all the while trying really, really hard not to care about "likes" or "stats"). Although I'm back on Facebook and although I'm still going to share my stuff, my ultimate goal is still to glorify God (without mixed motives like, "hmmmm... I wonder how many people will like or read this?!").

I love Facebook because it gives me the ability read about my friends and family all over the world. My parents and grandparents love my blog because they love reading about what we do everyday, or what I'm reading, and I hope, no, I really, really pray that I'm planting a seed for all of my family and friends. I want to glorify God and share the gospel so that you can glorify God with me through this blog and Facebook. I truly believe in enjoying small things like Facebook and blogging ALL because I can rest in the hope I have in Jesus Christ and what He did on the cross. That's it! THAT is what life is all about in the first place - Jesus Christ and the message of hope we have in Him. Without hope, we have nothing.

And that message is worth sharing - daily!

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